


Jiya Marri's Excellent Adventure

by TaleasOldasTimeandSpace



Category: Timeless - Fandom
Genre: Crack, Doctor Who AU, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, HEY LOOK I MANAGED TO WRITE A TIMELESS FIC WITHOUT A SINGLE GARCY REFERENCE, Jiya channels her Inner Rapunzel, Rufus should be grateful she doesn't have a frying pan, There is Potential for a series here which I'm doing my best to ignore, Y'all should be proud of me, but we'll see how long that lasts, let's see how many time travel pop-culture references we can make in one fic shall we?, pre-Riya really but the potential is there, riya - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-11-28 02:22:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20958881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaleasOldasTimeandSpace/pseuds/TaleasOldasTimeandSpace
Summary: In which Jiya Marri encounters a man who may or may not be mad, is definitely salty, and keeps all of time and space in a big blue box.





	Jiya Marri's Excellent Adventure

**Author's Note:**

> In the best Hobbit tradition, a birthday present from me to you :)

Connor had told Jiya repeatedly that her habit of staying after hours to finish coding projects was going to get her in trouble, but she always laughed and waved off his concern. After all, it wasn’t like she was the only one who did it. And besides, she’d never had a problem. Not until the night she caught the guy hanging half out of the Lifeboat. 

‘Hey, you! You can’t be in there!’ She brandished the top of her _ Star Trek _ desk toy, every one of Connor’s corporate espionage horror stories flashing through her mind. She’d hate to break the collectable, but if it came down to her life or the _ Enterprise_, she’d choose herself. Kirk and the rest of the crew would understand.

The man popped out of the Lifeboat and pulled a badge case from the pocket of his hoodie. ‘I think you’ll find I can,’ he said, flipping it open.

She narrowed her eyes, glancing between him and the case. ‘It’s blank.’

He blinked. ‘What?’

She lifted the metal _ Enterprise _ higher. ‘Who are you? How did you get past the guards without even a fake ID?’

‘Who says the guards saw me?’ he asked, frowning at the paper. ‘This usually works,’ he added, tapping it a couple of times before holding it up again. ‘Are you sure you don’t see anything?’

‘I think I know a blank piece of paper when I see one. How dumb do you think I am, anyway?’

He slipped the badge back into his pocket and grinned at her. ‘On the contrary, I think you must be more than ordinarily brilliant. Are you working on this?’ he asked, slapping the side of the Lifeboat like he was a used car salesman. ‘I gotta say, not bad for a first effort. Not very roomy though, is it?’

‘It’s a prototype,’ she said defensively. The Mothership might be Connor’s baby, but the Lifeboat was hers. She was the one who’d spent countless hours fine-tuning the programming. How dare some weirdo who thought he could waltz through a highly secured, top secret facility with nothing more than a blank piece of paper insult her life’s work? ‘I suppose you think you could do better?’

‘I wouldn’t want to brag, but…’ He shrugged. ‘Yeah, actually. Wanna see?’ 

Oookay, the dude was obviously crazy. Mason Industries was on the cutting edge of this research, and they were still a couple of years out from getting the Lifeboat and Mothership fully functional. No way he had a working, let alone superior, time machine. Did she humour him until she could flag down a security guard, or did she bean him over the head with the _ Enterprise _ and make a break for it now? ‘Who _ are _ you?’

‘Oh, you can call me Rufus.’

‘Rufus.’ He nodded. ‘And you want to show me your time machine.’ He nodded again. She snorted and lowered the _ Enterprise._ A nut he might be, but he was probably a harmless nut. ‘I hate to break it to you, _ Rufus_, but you missed Bill and Ted by about thirty years.’

He grinned again, bright and friendly and unfairly cute for a nutjob, drat him. ‘That’s what the time machine’s for. You coming?’

She shouldn’t. She really shouldn’t. She should call Karl in the security office right now and turn Rufus in, and let him talk about his roomy time machine to a couple of friendly men in white coats. And yet…

She set the_ Enterprise _ back on its stand. ‘Okay, Rufus, show me what you got.’

* * *

‘But seriously, Rufus, how did you get past the security? Karl's really good at his job, and there's no way he would let you in here with that non-existent ID of yours.'

He flashed that grin at her again as he led her deeper into the labyrinth of Mason Industries. From what she remembered from her orientation tour, all that was back there was storage rooms and cobwebs.

Well, not cobwebs. Mason Industries was too modern and well-maintained for those, all chrome and glass and polished concrete. Not very cozy, and maybe there weren't very many windows once you got past the lobby and conference rooms, but it certainly was no post-apocalyptic fallout shelter, either. They had government contracts and everything.

‘I told you,' he said, patting his pocket and drawing her out of her musings on proper secret lab aesthetics, ‘it usually works. Psychic paper, shows people whatever they need to see to get me where I need to go. It's very rare that you didn't see anything.'

‘Oh, that's probably 'cause I'm psychic.' She lifted a shoulder in a careless shrug.

He goggled at her, which was very satisfying considering his blasé reaction to the Lifeboat. Time machines were old hat apparently, but psychic powers, ooooooh!

‘Yup, that would explain it. Do you get it from your parents?'

‘Nah. Training accident leaning to pilot the Lifeboat. Couple of seizures later, suddenly I can see the future. It's not very reliable, but it did clear up my heart murmur, which is more than you can say for most work-related injuries.' She’d gone several steps before she realized he was no longer beside her. She turned to find him staring at her. ‘What?’

‘You still work here after that?’

‘Uh, duh.’ She spread her hands. ‘I volunteered for the training, and I knew the risks going in. learning to pilot a time machine? Totally worth it. Besides, MI’s got a great benefits package.’

He shook his head, muttering something that sounded like _ humans _ under his breath.

‘So I don’t mean to be pushy or anything, but I don’t see anything that looks like a time machine. Please don’t tell me you brought me back here to chop me up and stuff me in one of the storage closets, because that would just ruin what could otherwise be a beautiful friendship.’

He cocked an eyebrow. ‘Do you always wander deserted hallways with potential axe murderers?’

‘Only the cute ones. Besides, I’ve got Karl on speed dial. Anyway, I’m not seeing anything that looks like a time machine. What gives?’

‘You think I’m—nope, that’s not important. It should be right about…’ He opened the door next to him and poked his head in. ‘Here. Coming?’

‘Rufus. I thought we agreed you weren’t going to murder me.’

He winked at her. ‘I made no such promises. C’mon.’

Jiya didn’t _ really _ think he was an axe murderer, but it still took her a couple of seconds to follow him into the closet. Once inside, she stared at the large blue box jammed in among the copy paper and spare circuit boards. _ PUBLIC CALL BOX _ glowed dimly in the faint light from the hallway. ‘I was kidding about Bill and Ted, you know,’ she said, voice faint.

Rufus had already pushed open the door and stepped inside. ‘They actually modeled the time machine in the movie after my TARDIS.’ His voice was oddly echoey and sounded farther away than it really should considering the size of the booth.

She stepped through the door, and her jaw dropped. ‘What…_ how…’ _

‘Well, I helped the writer out of some trouble with a clan of Rigelian swamp bats that were nesting in his attic, and—oh, you weren’t talking about the movie. Told you it was roomy.’

_ Roomy _ was an understatement. Rufus was leaning against an instrument panel that sprouted from a raised platform in the centre of a large chamber. The entire Mothership could have fit inside with room to spare, and she could see a door on the far wall leading, presumably, _ impossibly_, to more rooms. A mezzanine circled the top of the chamber, with display screens and panels of blinking lights and blocky switches dotting the walls at regular intervals. 

‘It’s…it’s…’ Words would be useful, but Jyia was having a hard time remembering any.

‘It is, isn’t it?’ Rufus was obviously enjoying her meltdown. She couldn’t really blame him.

‘Did you _ make _ this? Your—what did you call it?’

‘TARDIS. Stands for Time and Relative Dimension in Space. And I didn’t make it, but my people specialize in them.’ He turned, flicking switches and poking at buttons and generally avoiding her eyes. ‘I just kind of…borrowed it. Indefinitely.’

‘You stole a time machine?’ They hadn’t known each other very long, but somehow the revelation didn’t surprise her at all. ‘But wait a minute, what do you mean, your people? Is that like a “I'll have my people call your people” kind of thing? Aren’t you from the future?’ She followed him up to the control panel.

‘Well, yeah, but that's not exactly what I meant. I’m, uh, not from around here, if you know what I mean.’

She processed that for a minute. ‘You’re an _ alien?’ _

‘Wow, rude. I’m a timelord, thank you very much.’

‘But, like, you’re from space. A space alien.’

He huffed, retreating into his hoodie like a disgruntled turtle. ‘I don’t have antennae or anything. Technically we’re all just hanging out on chunks of rock in space. How’d you like it if I called _ you _ a space alien?’

‘That’d be pretty cool, actually.’ She stretched out a finger to give one of the flashing lights an experimental poke, grinning when it shifted from green to purple. ‘But if you’re from space, why do you sound like you’re from Chicago?’

‘Lots of planets have a Chicago!’

She stared at him. ‘Really?’

‘Yes really, but that’s beside the point.’

‘And the point is?’

‘The point is you’ve probably never actually traveled through time, right? I’m guessing you’re still a couple of years away from being up and running.’

She lifted a shoulder. ‘Yeah, so?’

‘So, where would you want to go? Anywhere in time and space.’ He reached out, almost absently giving her hair a gentle tug before stuffing his hand in his pocket. ‘You choose.’

‘Anywhere, huh?’ She grinned. ‘In that case, I know just the place. Culver City, July 19, 1965.’

‘Why then?' he asked as he began working the controls.

‘It's when they started filming _ Where No Man Has Gone Before.' _

_ ‘Star Trek, _ huh? Most people want to see the premiere of _ A New Hope.' _

‘That could be cool too, but I was always more of a Trekkie than a Jedi.' He slammed the switch back that he'd just thrown, making her jump. ‘Hey! What's your problem?'

‘I'm sorry, Jiya, but I can't time travel with somebody who thinks _ Star Trek _ is better than _ Star Wars.' _ He caught her arm and started steering her back to the entrance.

‘Seriously?' She dug in her heels. ‘You're an _ alien_. Why do you have an opinion on earth media?'

‘Hey, when you've got a time machine, you have the opportunity to watch a lot of movies. And _ Star Wars _ is obviously superior.'

She rolled her eyes. ‘Oh, for—You said anywhere I wanted. This is what I want. You going to back out now?'

‘Fine.' He dropped her arm and turned back to the console. ‘You want _ Star Trek? _ I'll give you _ Star Trek.' _

Lights started flashing. From somewhere, she couldn't determine where, there was a wheezing sound, like a foghorn with laryngitis, then a _ thud. _ Rufus gestured toward the door with a rather sarcastic set of jazz hands. ‘Ready to boldly go?'

‘Absolutely!' She ran for the door, but stopped with a hand on the handle. ‘How do you feel about _ Lord of the Rings?' _

‘Epic, genre-defining, really cool.' He cocked his head. ‘Why?'

‘Well, it could also be an acceptable compromise, a middle-ground, if you will. For a next trip, maybe?'

He laughed and opened the door. ‘We'll see. Let's try to survive this one, first.'

‘It's_ Star Trek, _ man! what could possibly go wrong?'

**Author's Note:**

> Much, in fact. Amid much running and screaming and explosions (and being preserved for posterity as extras), Jiya and Rufus manage to thwart an attempt by a shady, alien-influenced organization called Rittenhouse to stop the pilot from ever being filmed, with the aim to change sci-fi forever. The same organization that Rufus tracked to MI in the first place...
> 
> This all grew out of the one (1) line about lots of planets having a Chicago. This is apparently a theme with me and Riya fics.
> 
> Come say hi on [Tumblr](https://taleasoldastime-andspace.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
